This week is one of my rare personal posts. I have always intended this blog to be about ministry to people with additional needs but as is often the case, I find myself learning and being challenged along the way. Sometimes I am very challenged.
This week I have failed…and failed a lot. No matter how much time and effort I put into doing the right things, striving to do all that is expected of me and still have time for people, Bible study and prayer….I fail.
This week I have let people down.
I have forgotten important things…like a family birthday.
I failed to reach certain standards at work and didn’t get some things done by the deadline.
I have hurt people because I said the wrong thing, or snapped at them, or couldn’t spend enough time with them.
I couldn’t cope with other people’s problems so I hid away.
I didn’t do something I should have and caused a lot of upset to someone because of it.
This week I failed and failed and it made me feel crap.
The way out of the pit.
One thing I have learned as a Christian is that God can truly meet all my needs. He promises me that if I trust in Jesus there is no condemnation from him for me. I am set free from guilt and sin…..WOW!
I need to remember to go to Him in prayer and ask him for what I need. This week I need to ask for forgiveness, mercy, memory, the ability to sort out what is really important from what is not….and rest….yes…rest (PLEASE!). It is a lesson I have been learning for years and each time God takes me a little deeper into knowing and trusting him.
This week his answer to me is this….
2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Therefore, we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
This week I will still fail, let people down, not be good enough, forget things and upset people. But don’t you notice it too….we live in a world that is constantly judging, measuring and reporting on our worthiness. And I bet that you sometimes don’t live up to these standards too.
But what about God’s standards?
His is perfection.
But we can’t live up to that if we can’t even live up to this messed up world’s standards.
Then we thank God that he sent his son Jesus. The only one who ever lived a perfect life because we cannot. He died for our failures, sins and evil ways. He died to be our saviour.
So next week I am going to remember that God sees me as perfect through Jesus, because when we put our trust in Jesus this is the promise we receive.
To my family, friends, colleagues at work and in ministry I am sorry when I fail you. Where I can I will put it right. Where I can’t I will ask you to forgive me and let God’s grace restore us and make our weaknesses show HIS strength and power at work in us.
Thank you for listening.