Supporting churches to include people with Autism and Learning Disabilties

Archive for the ‘refelctions’ Category

Living hopefully in the storm

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Some of you will have read a post I put up a few days ago called “Storm before the Calm.”  I have taken this down as I was embarrassed at how raw it was.  I was having a bad weekend emotionally but thanks to a lovely friend who helped me feel much better after a good chat,  I’m rewriting it as something that can stay on the blog.  (Thanks so much to those that already replied – I have all your comments and you are much appreciated).

Like a lot of people, I have been quite upset by things way beyond my control.  The main things that have ‘stormed’ into my life are:

  1. The news – terrorist attacks, tower block fires, the stupid election (my views are my own!) and just not knowing what the government are doing. I still don’t want Brexit and the process frightens me. It’s unsettling, hard to escape.  Two girls from my town died in the Manchester attack.  Everyone I know shares the worry and grief over all the incidents and events in our country these past months.

 

  1. A death happened. A young person took their own life.  I’m grieving for them and their family.  I have been researching mental health and young people and find that we are ignoring the risks and pressures that affect our young people.  It feels like we are sleepwalking into a crisis.  Many people think that’s already happening.  I’m praying and wondering what the church should be doing.

 

  1. For some time I’ve been wondering about how I can share much more of the resources we’ve built up over 10 years of our Good News Group. Particularly our Bible teaching materials but also sharing our story and training for churches.  I want so much to give our adults in the group, opportunity to speak for themselves and for others with learning disabilities to have access to good teaching materials.

 

And this is where I asked for help in my last post.  If you read includedbygrace regularly I’d like to hear from you.  If you’ve happened to read it by random google search, I want to hear from you.  I want to know what you think of includedbygrace and the information I share.  What it means to you and how it has helped you (or not).

If you want to say a pray for this please pray that God will make this what he wants it to be.  I have been blessed by a conversation with two web developers who are interested in designing an accessible website with me.  Maybe that’s a thing that includedbygrace can become.  I have no funding, only faith at this point in time.  But I believe in a God who funds his own projects.

My second idea is to build a team of trainers from our Good News Group who can tell churches how they can be better included.  I experimented with doing this by video when I went to London and this was one way of sharing their voice.  Locally I can take people to places we speak.

Thirdly, I’d love to reach out to special schools in our area.  Maybe with assemblies or sensory Bible stories.  I’d need a team of GNG members to help me…and again the logistics are huge.  But not for God!

In my mind are a lot of other random ideas.  I only want to go in the direction God has prepared and not waste time on things that won’t work.  The aim is to spread the gospel and disciple children, teens and adults with learning disabilities, giving them accessible Bible teaching and resources.  Also, it is to equip churches to do this work too.  We are a small team…living hopefully in the storms…

The Storm before the calm.

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Which way is the right way?        photo from http://www.i.telegraph.co.uk  

Psalm 143  

A praise song of David.

143 Lord, hear my prayer.
    Listen to my call for help and answer my prayer.
    Show me how good and loyal you are.
Don’t judge me, your servant.
    No one alive could be judged innocent by your standards.
My enemies are chasing me.
    They have crushed me into the dirt.
They are pushing me into the dark grave,
    like people who died long ago.
I am ready to give up.
    I am losing my courage.
But I remember what happened long ago.
    I am thinking about all you have done.
    I am talking about what you made with your hands!
I lift my hands in prayer to you.
    I am waiting for your help, like a dry land waiting for rain. 

Hurry and answer me, Lord!
    I have lost my courage.
Don’t turn away from me.
    Don’t let me die and become like the people lying in the grave.
Show me your faithful love this morning.
    I trust in you.
Show me what I should do.
    I put my life in your hands!
Lord, I come to you for protection.
    Save me from my enemies.
10 Show me what you want me to do.
    You are my God.
Let your good Spirit lead me over level ground.
11 Lord, let me live
    so that people will praise your name.
Show me how good you are
    and save me from my trouble.
12 Show me your love
    and defeat my enemies.
Destroy those who are trying to kill me
    because I am your servant.

Easy-to-Read Version (ERV)Copyright © 2006 by Bible League International

 

It has been difficult for me to keep up with my blog recently.  I even wonder if anyone is at all bothered about that…

But it has been difficult because the Lord seems to be taking me through a storm.  Not literally, but in my life and in my thoughts, there is a storm raging.  And it’s exhausting me.

I’ve started to pray through Psalm 143 as above.  One thing I have learned in all these years as a Christian is that storms have been good for me.  Not while I’m in the middle of them – but always afterwards there is a new thing in my life because some old things have been sorted out.  God is good like that.

So I trust Jesus and only him to see this storm through.  I hold onto his promises as I wait for the winds to decide which direction they want to settle on (i.e.. which path I should take) and while I wait for the lightening strikes to subside (i.e.. hopefully the problems being thrown my way will ease off.)  The heavy rain is like all the emotions I feel as the storm rages; the emotions pour on me and soak me through.   I’d like those to ease off please.

But I know that God uses the storms to clear the air and refresh the land.

I have been praying about the next steps for ‘includedbygrace’ for a long while now.  I think God is wanting me to move into something new and develop it into more useful things for and with people with learning disabilities, so that they can learn more about Jesus in a way that is accessible.

If you read this (and can make any sense of it – and if you can’t – I shall have to try again to make it more sense-able!)  could you write a comment or send me a message and tell me what ‘includedbygrace’ means to you, what you have got out of it and what you think it could do more of?

Thank you

Lynn  x

 

Can we all be a bit more like Angela please?

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Psalm 131 (NIRV)

A song for those who go up to Jerusalem to worship the Lord. A psalm of David.

Lord, my heart isn’t proud.
My eyes aren’t proud either.
I don’t concern myself with important matters.
I don’t concern myself with things that are too wonderful for me.
I have made myself calm and content
like a young child in its mother’s arms.
Deep down inside me, I am as content as a young child.

Israel, put your hope in the Lord
both now and forever.

I’ve just come home after attending the funeral of one of our Good News Group members.  Angela had Down’s Syndrome and lived to be 61.  She lived with her family and was part of a church that loved and accepted her as she was.  She’d been at the GNG for many years but hadn’t been attending for almost a year due to being ill….but she is and always will be part of our family.  We will miss her very much.

You see Angela didn’t have very many words but those she did have she used to great effect.  She introduced herself to everyone – literally everyone – by going up to them with a huge smile on her face and greeting them with “Hello, my name is Angela” in a beautiful sing song voice.

Angela loved handbags, football and colouring in.  She loved music and singing worship songs and got so excited when we had puppets that we used to just get them out of the box and sit one next to her, just to share in her delight.  She had a twinkle in her eye that told us when she was joking or pulling our leg and Jesus shone in her and from her every pore. And Angela could say “supercalifragilisticexpialidocious” because that came from one of her favourite films.

Angela was never judgemental.  She had no regard for status or rank.  She treated everyone the same whether she liked you or you had done something that annoyed her (although she was never mad for long).   Angela lived each day just for that day and didn’t seem to worry about the future.  She did love and engage with everyone around her, no matter who you were.   The Queen would have had the same greeting as a pauper.

A bit like the Jesus I know.

I’m tired of people being excluded from church families because they are different, don’t fit the mould or are the wrong kind of person.  “Are you disabled? Well, you can’t do this or that.   Are you a woman…then, you can’t do this or that.  Are you LGBT?…then, you can’t do this or that.  Are you a foreigner?…well you can’t do this or that.  Can’t you keep you disabled child quiet?…then you can’t do this or that.  Are you mentally ill?…then you can’t do this or that.  We can’t have our churches run by these kinds of people.”  

 Did Jesus make up these categories…I don’t think so…

But these are the messages I hear from all kinds of Christians and church people.  We’re all shouting at each other and no-one seems to be listening.  (Except maybe the outside world who think what are they on about?!)

So, in my grief today I was reminded that Jesus came for all of mankind.  That no-one is excluded unless they think they don’t need him.   I want to be more like Angela and accept everyone, just as they are.  I am working it out as He teaches me what that looks like in practice.  I’m willing to be shown where I’ve got it wrong –  by the Spirit working in and through the people and situations I meet.   At the moment I don’t even know if I want to part of ‘the church’ in this country that’s doing a lot of shouting – but not about the gospel, only at each other.  But I expect God will sort my thoughts out about that eventually.

So will you join me in being more like Angela?  Angela’s name means “MESSENGER OF GOD” and here’s her message. It’s simple really.  Open up your arms and greet people in the name of Jesus.   No matter who they are.

Multi-Ethnic Group Of People Holding The Word Welcome

2017 – A consistent God in an unpredictable world.

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It’s that funny week we have every year when we’re not sure what day it is and there’s nothing much going on.  The TV is full of films and the odd ‘Christmas Special’, and we might be asking each other “What are you doing for New Year?”.

As we think about what happened in 2016 and what 2017 might be like it can seem very frightening.  2016 was full of wars, political upheavals and celebrity deaths (Even over Christmas we lost Rick Parfitt, George Michael and Carrie Fisher).  We got Brexit and Donald Trump, we have millions of refugees and no-one knows when there might be an end to the wars in the Middle East or the terrorism in Europe, Africa and Pakistan.  It’s no surprise that people are anxious about the future and don’t feel like celebrating on New Year’s Eve.

However, as Christians we have a hope that goes beyond the things we can see and hear on the news.  We have a God who doesn’t change and who promises to be with us.  The news does report the spreading of the gospel in the Middle East or the millions of daily interactions God has with his people through the Holy Spirit active on the earth.  They don’t report how Jesus is interceding for us at the right hand of the Father’s throne.  But despite all we hear in the news or don’t – God is a God that keeps his promises.  In these times of uncertainty, we have to hold on to His words and not let ourselves get caught up in the panic of the world’s view.

Isaiah 41:10  Easy-to-Read Version (ERV)

Don’t worry—I am with you.

Don’t be afraid—I am your God.

I will make you strong and help you.

I will support you with my right hand that brings victory.

I hope these verses will encourage you this New Year.  2017 might bring worse news or better news. We cannot know.  But our Father in heaven, our saviour Jesus and the Holy Spirit are who we worship and who we have put our faith in.  If you haven’t and you are reading this, then please investigate more.  Read one of the gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke or John and see who this Jesus is.  He is God made flesh.  He came to show us what the Father is like.  If we know Jesus and put our faith in Him, then we know the Father.  We couldn’t have anything better in our lives.  I hope you find that truth in your life.  Here is one of his promises that always gives me hope, no matter what the future looks like in this world.

Micah 7:18-20The Message (MSG)

Where is the god who can compare with you—

wiping the slate clean of guilt,

Turning a blind eye, a deaf ear,

to the past sins of your purged and precious people?

You don’t nurse your anger and don’t stay angry long,

for mercy is your specialty. That’s what you love most.

And compassion is on its way to us.

You’ll stamp out our wrongdoing.

You’ll sink our sins

to the bottom of the ocean.

You’ll stay true to your word to Father Jacob

and continue the compassion you showed Grandfather Abraham—

Everything you promised our ancestors

from a long time ago.

pray

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People with learning disabilities are scared about the news too.

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This past month has been really difficult for me.  It was building up since before the Brexit vote, but that tipped the scales.  I’ve been worrying about even watching the news, wondering what horrible event will happen next.  I’ve been upset with the political situations in Britain, Turkey, America, and the middle east.  Upset about the violence, murder and persecution of people all around the world.  I’ve been trying to pray for those killed and hurt in attacks, not just in Europe, not just those splashed across the newspapers in our country, but the forgotten and ignored tragedies in Syria, Iraq, Nigeria and other countries.

But I’m overwhelmed.  On top of the exhaustion that comes to every teacher at the end of the school year, I want to yell at God…”STOP THE WORLD…AND LET ME GET OFF!”  I’ve not been sure how to cope at all.

And it was in this state that I set up the ‘Day of Prayer for our Nation’ on Facebook. (Join me here if you still want to pray).  That did help a lot.  In searching the Bible for guidance and when a wonderful friend offered to help, we remembered our response to this world is to pray and to share God’s love.  Praying through those prayers as the day went on, really helped calm my troubled soul…and continue to do so.

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It is so important to include people with learning disabilities in our engagement with what is going on in the world. They worry too. They hear and are affected by what is going on, sometimes more directly than we are.  (Take the Government’s welfare reforms as an example). We can pray with them and give them access to praying with us if we help their communication.  The accessible prayers are just one example. Signing or pictures may help  some. I know L’Arche communities are wonderfully experienced in building the prayer lives of everyone in their communities.

On the Wednesday, at our usual Good News Group meeting we set aside some time to pray for our nation, using the accessible prayers that I had made for the Friday.  Each table had a set and the members and carers each chose a prayer to offer, in our usual ways of either reading it out themselves, a team member reading it for them or just by placing it in the centre of the table, showing that they are offering their prayers to God.

Everyone there took a prayer and offered it to the Lord. What really struck me was their real concerns and worries about Brexit and all that was happening.  People with learning disabilities hear things on the news and worry the same as the rest of us, we shouldn’t be surprised.  They too want to make sense of it all.  The comments I want to share with you show how much they care about this.

D, who isn’t a Christian but comes to the group every week, was really fascinated by the prayers we had set out on the table.  He said “I’m really glad you’ve put these out.  I don’t believe but I want you to pray about this…” and he passed a card to one of the team to pray. 

V said “I’ve been hearing about all this on the news. It’s terrible.  What’s going to happen, I don’t know.” and she chose a prayer for all the politicians. 

E said, “I’m worried about what will happen to my carer.  She’s not from this country.  I’m scared they are going to take her away, then who’s going to help me then? She’s lovely is my carer. I don’t want another one.” 

And all around the room, people with learning disabilities were joining in as prayer warriors for this nation.  Lord hear our prayers.  Lord have mercy.  Lord hear our prayers.

I’m hoping that others have joined us too.  I sent out the accessible prayers to a few people who asked for them, so if you were one of those, I’d love to hear how your prayer times went.

I feel that God has been sending me encouragement this week in two blogs I have read.  I am sharing them here and hope that if you feel overwhelmed and discouraged they will help you too.  Firstly Anthony Delany reminded me of the parable Jesus told us about how we should know that there is evil in this world. God is allowing the weeds and the wheat to grow in the ground together but he will protect his wheat and burn the weeds at the harvest.  It helped me.  And then Helen Murray encouraged me by reminding me of how Gideon felt when God asked him to fight the Midionites – and to go in the strength that we have because God is with us.  Thank you both.

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Consider the history of people with learning disabilities in discipling them

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Did you watch “Call the Midwife” over the Christmas break?  For those of you who didn’t, it’s a drama set in the 1950s and 60s about midwives in the East End of London.  This Christmas episode focussed on a group of unmarried mothers in a mother and baby ‘home’.  It was a bit (well, a lot) sanitised in the programme but reminded me of the way unmarried and pregnant girls used to be treated.  Their babies were often taken from them (whether they wanted it or not) and we can only imagine the effect on a whole hidden layer of our society – the mothers and the children, still alive and whose lives were forever changed by the decisions that were made.

My own grandmother was an unmarried mother in the 1930s. She had a terrible time as the family outcast, but the kindness of her sister and later reconciliation with her parents enabled her to bring up my dad as a single mum.  No wonder she was always such a fiercely determined woman!  Yes, things changed in society in the 1960s and 1970s but there are centuries of ill treatment and children being abandoned to overcome.  History is full of the illegitimate children of kings, but so many ordinary people must have been in the same situation, outcasts from the start.

The same attitudes went for those who were born with disabilities.  So many were outcasts and later in history shut away in large institutions. Some families bravely kept them at home, but education and employment were hardly options for these children.  Education and inclusion for people with learning disabilities, is a rather new concept.  In history we read about the ‘village idiot’ and the Victorian ‘asylums’, of homeless and neglected people with little opportunity in life but to rely on the charity of others.  Life expectancy was low for many people with learning and other disabilities.

Are you glad that you live in these times.  We have an imperfect but much improved education system.  It is enshrined in law that a broad and balanced education is a right for all.  We have social and national health services and community living.  There are some opportunities for employment.   Oh yes…there is far to go and much to complain about…but what if we start from a place of gratitude.  What we do have is a blessing and we can build upon the work of others and make it better in the future.

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In our churches, communities and towns are people with disabilities in their 40s, 50s, 60s and older who were born and raised when times were very different. In our group we have at least one person who grew up in a large institution… a large ‘metal’ hospital.  (As it was known). Now living in the community and well integrated into ordinary life, it is easy to forget how this early experience might have shaped his life.  Do we take the time to ask sensitively about the early lives of the people with learning and other disabilities in our churches?  it is easy to assume that they had schooling and support when they were younger…and maybe they did…but asking them about it might reveal some very interesting insights into the way they have been treated and brought up.  And be careful…we need to be very sensitive to safeguarding and respecting privacy.  Did you know that if an adult with disabilities reveals abuse or accusation to you, then it is their right to report it OR NOT?  This is the difference between adults and children, even if they are vulnerable.  I can cover this issue in another post if people are interested.

If we are to minister to the whole person and disciple them, then we do need to be aware of where they have come from.  I know from my own experience how Jesus ministers to the deepest and most vulnerable parts and heals what has hurt me or made me think wrongly.   People who have learning disabilities and maybe don’t have the words to say or work out what they need healing for, may be able to tell you about their childhood or early experiences.  A parent or carer may know some things that can help.  Then we must pray.  Only Jesus can tell us where to be sensitive and where to challenge.  Only Jesus knows each of us and all we have been through.  He knows what has shaped us for good or ill, and can heal….oh…he can heal…and make us whole in spirit.   It is how we are disciple and how we grow.  Praise God that none of us are different or excluded from this.

A Living Hope – 1 Peter 1:3-9

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God has great mercy, and because of his mercy he gave us a new life. This new life brings us a living hope through Jesus Christ’s resurrection from death. Now we wait to receive the blessings God has for his children. These blessings are kept for you in heaven. They cannot be ruined or be destroyed or lose their beauty.

God’s power protects you through your faith, and it keeps you safe until your salvation comes. That salvation is ready to be given to you at the end of time. I know the thought of that is exciting, even if you must suffer through different kinds of troubles for a short time now. These troubles test your faith and prove that it is pure. And such faith is worth more than gold. Gold can be proved to be pure by fire, but gold will ruin. When your faith is proven to be pure, the result will be praise and glory and honor when Jesus Christ comes.

You have not seen Christ, but still you love him. You can’t see him now, but you believe in him. You are filled with a wonderful and heavenly joy that cannot be explained. Your faith has a goal, and you are reaching that goal—your salvation.

Expectations…

There’s nothing like the chance to be interviewed on the radio to make me quake in my shoes and wonder what I’m doing this for…

But it is good to stop, reflect and think about why I write this blog…and what I expect God might do with it. So my friend did a little interview with me to give me some practice….

Q1. Why did I start to write a blog?

When three of us (Bob, Gill and I) unexpectedly had to take on the leadership of the Good News Group about 3 years ago, I remember writing in my journal “please God, don’t make me do this, I can’t do it, I don’t want to do it.”  Well, it is obvious what God’s answer to that was!  But because we all felt inadequate, it made us pray…and pray…and pray.  One thing we prayed was for God to share his vision for the group with us so that we could have some idea that we we walking in the direction he wanted us to.  The word that came to us was “REACHOUT”.  And so, looking at the way the world works today, I decided to write a blog about what we do and see how it would reach out to others.

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Q2. Why is it called “includedbygrace”?

Grace is a wonderful and amazing gift of God through Jesus Christ. It is grace that accepts and loves us no matter what we have done and grace makes God’s love unchanging and undeserved.  I live in the light of that grace and so do we all.  “Included by grace” means all of us, whether society sees us as acceptable or not, and as inclusion is the focus of what we do, then the name seemed to explain it.

Q3.  What response have you had to your blog?

I expected a few people to follow and comment on the blog but I have been really pleased at how many people do read it.  It’s a thrill when I look at the STATs and see people from all over the world looking at what I have written.  I get a lot of private messages, as well as public comments,  because there are parents and individuals for who church has been really difficult, and their stories help me form what advice and issues I need to add to my blog.

Q4. How is God building this ministry’s ‘Reaching out’?

Being part of the Facebook page for the Additional Needs Alliance has complimented this blog really well and enabled us to build connections with the main Christian disabilty charities.  I now have great links with http://www.prospects.org.ukhttp://www.throughtheroof.orghttp://www.urbansaints.org , our local diocese,  http://www.careforthefamily.org.uk/Family-life/parent-support/parenting-additional-challenges/additional-needs-support,  http://www.churchesforall.org.uk and http://musingsofakidsworker.blogspot.co.uk/ .  As a group we are so encouraged and equipped by these links and love the fact that there is a great network for us all to belong to.  They are ‘Reaching out’ too!

Last year, my blog attracted an enquiry from the writer Sarah Lothian who wrote the article about us that was in this August’s Christianity magazine and locally we have been invited to share what we do and how we do it with a number of different churches and groups.  Here is just a snap shot of some of the ‘reaching out’ we have been doing…

  • Closer work with our sister church, St John’s, who run a monthly group for ALD.
  • Presentation to the Liverpool Disability Network.
  • Talk to over 60 pastoral assistants in our diocese.
  • Article in Christianity magazine.
  • Practical activities with Lancashire Spirituality Network.
  • Visit to support and encourage Kendal Propsects Group.
  • Training and support for a child with autism at a church in Preston.
  • Invited to talk about our Good News Group and inclusive church on Premier Radio (coming soon!)
  • Talks with printers / publishers to print and make our Bible teaching materials available to others.

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Q5. So what are your expectations for the future?

My husband has a saying, “expect the unexpected” and that is a great thing to keep in mind. This ministry is God’s work and we are just his servants.  I don’t want to put limits on what God wants to do, and I don’t want to impose my plans on His.  I often say how much this ministry is dependent on the fantastic team of people who are committed to serving at the Good News Group every week.  They turn up, pray faithfully and serve with love in their hearts.  (I always say that I am just the ‘gobby’ one who talks about it to everyone!)  The ministry is about including people with learning disabilties in the gospel message, changing their lives through Jesus Christ, and then giving them a place in our church family. As the Bible says; it does not depend on man’s efforts, but on God’s mercy.  So let’s watch this space….

My visit to London is now shaping up nicely.  We’ve mangaed to coordinate the Premier Radio interview, the Christian New Media conference and Award ceromony into one weekend!  I am greatly blessed with funding for my train ticket and accomodation offers and am very grateful to those who have offered and given. All I need to do now is practice my humble acceptance or gracious in defeat face for the award night….hope I don’t cry either way..LOL!

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